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Filtered dictionary
An unblinking, pathetic stare designed to mentally break a human into surrendering a piece of ham.
Read full entry →An unsolicited gift of a saliva-soaked tennis ball, usually delivered right as you dress for an event.
Read full entry →The terrifying canine detection of entities, ghosts, or drafts that humans cannot perceive.
Read full entry →A mandatory sacrifice of dairy products demanded by a hound the moment the refrigerator seal is broken.
Read full entry →The intense, unbroken gaze a canine locks onto its owner while assuming the position.
Read full entry →A cruel sleight of hand designed to send a trusting animal sprinting after absolutely nothing.
Read full entry →The rapid, predatory circling of a kitchen floor by a hound seeking a dropped piece of cheese.
Read full entry →The prideful, dirt-flinging moonwalk a canine performs to announce its dominance over a lawn.
Read full entry →The high-stakes game of investigating an ex's 2017 holiday album with sweaty thumbs.
Read full entry →The shameful abandonment of frozen peas next to the dog food because you couldn't be bothered to walk back.
Read full entry →The terrifying canine habit of aggressively warning off invisible entities at 2 AM.
Read full entry →The silent, unblinking psychological warfare waged by a pet wanting your dinner.
Read full entry →The manipulative canine tactic of resting a heavy head on a human thigh to beg for scraps.
Read full entry →The aggressive, prideful kicking of dirt by a canine who has just completed their business.
Read full entry →The baffling psychological desire to gently crush something because it is overwhelmingly adorable.
Read full entry →The desperate dive to retrieve a dropped sausage before the hound intercepts it.
Read full entry →The canine protest involving planting all four paws firmly and refusing to get wet.
Read full entry →The intense, accusatory sniffing a pet performs when you have patted a rival animal.
Read full entry →The legally binding vocal requirement when a canine elongates its front legs.
Read full entry →The automatic application of human social norms to an animal.
Read full entry →The canine practice of loudly defending the house against a leaf blowing down the street.
Read full entry →The cruel but hilarious human deception of hiding a ball behind your back.
Read full entry →The dangerous pet habit of staying exactly one millimeter behind a human's foot.
Read full entry →The immediate mobilization of a dog when they hear a crumb hit the linoleum.
Read full entry →The dictionary is still being written
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